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Showing posts from August, 2014

'Have a nap'

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Good advice! Good luck! Why am I writing this when I could be having a nap? Because I just. Can't. Sleep. 
I am the most tired I have ever been but for some reason I just can't sleep in the daytime. Despite the two year old being out with his dad and the 3 week old finally dropping off after a feed and lots of cuddles. I think it's because 1. I have too much to think about and I can't turn it off. 2. At some point I have to shower and if I don't do it now will I get a chance later? And 3. It's like trying to sleep next to a flipping beautiful ticking time bomb! 

Who knows when this bundle of joy will wake up again and need me!? Plus if he's been asleep for half an hour already so the time I have left to sleep is dwindling and I still haven't had that shower. 
Tiredness is turning me into a grumpy, hopeless, joyless, worrier but what can I do? I guess suck it up and try to be positive until this wonderful little man decides he can sleep for more than 2 hour…

Three weeks... Tiredness kills

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Samuel is three weeks old and generally doing really well. He seems to be struggling a little bit at the moment to be content though. I think he has a tummy problem, he seems to be in pain and grouching a lot in his sleep or when he is awake especially if he is not being held. He will also cry out when feeding and scream and arch his back sometimes before he does a poo. He feeds very frequently and he is basically leaking poo all the time which is making his bottom very sore. We have been to the doctors and have cream for him bum and we are going back today. I hope it is not something that I am eating that is making his tummy hurt. If anyone has any ideas then please let me know!

At three weeks Samuel is very strong and can hold his head up on his own for quite a few seconds and he even rolled from his front to his back once a few days ago (but I think this must've been a fluke as he is a bit little for that!). He is putting on lots of weight and I am already missing him being so…

Taking out two...

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Today I went out for the first time on my own with the two boys. I must say in the days leading up to this I was pretty anxious about venturing out on my own with them! How would I keep hold of and entertain a toddler when the baby needed a feed or change or cuddle? How would I get them safely in and out of the car? Where would I go?

I didn't know but I did my best to be prepared - About halfway trough the pregnancy I had purchased a brand new, shiney Phil&Teds tandem 'dot' pushchair. I've never been one to spend much money on stuff like this and for over £400 (with raincover and extra seat) I was nervous I had made the right decision but so far it has been a godsend! It is heavy but does it's job well, it fits in the boot of my tiny car without removing wheels or anything and is comfy for both boys. Samuel can snuggle in the underneath lying flat and away from the strong sunshine or wind and Jacob can hop in and out of the chair on top when he needs to. It is …

Baby blues

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For the first couple of days of Samuel's life I was on cloud nine - despite niggling little worries about how I would cope with two when their dad went back to work.

Then came the baby blues. I'm told it's very normal to get tearful a few days after havig a baby. It happens to most mums. I found myself crying at the drop of a hat. My husband would give me a hug and a flood of tears would pour out of me. I didn't even have any real reason to cry but it did feel sad and hopeless. Very disconcerting. This info on BabyCentre sums it up really well and also has some good advice.
I suffered with post natal depression after Jacob's birth and had to take some medication to help me feel normal again. I am dreading going down that road this time so the unexplained tears and emotions led me to worry more than I would have otherwise. 
However, the boy's daddy pointed me in the direction of a letter that Stephen Fry had written to one of his fans on the subject of depressio…

Homecoming

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We were discharged from the hospital two nights after Samuel was born. With Jacob We had to stay in for 5 nights and this time I was relieved to be able to stay in for a couple of nights too. I had been dreading being sent home after 6 hours a bag of nerves and in shock. I enjoyed the time in hospital to regroup and be reassured that Samuel was ok and healthy enough to leave and also to rest myself. I was so nervous that I wouldn't be able to rest at home!


The boy's Daddy (TD) was excited to show off the new arrival on the way home so we popped to see his nan first. Then a meal had been arranged at my mum and dad's for us which was really nice but it was a boiling hot day and in the end I have to leave to go home quite quickly so that I could relax. It was all so overwhelming. The world around me had changed - at least the way I felt about it had. We drove through towns on the way home that I found scary which I hadn't before and I was frightened about everyone's …

Our new arrival - birth story

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On the 24th July 2014 at 4.30am my waters broke.

This time around we were much calmer. We phoned the hospital to let them know but waited until 6am to phone my mum to ask her to come and look after Jacob. The contractions hadn't really started much so I had a shower, got ready and tidied the house while we waited. We had both been at work the day before and it was the first day of our 6 week summer holiday together. We can't argue with that for timing! Jacobs Dad and I drove to the hospital full of excitement and nerves about what was to come.

Once we got there I was sent to the labour ward to be examined. They said that my 'hind waters' had broken and it was just leaking, contractions slowed up like they did last time (I think I was getting nervous) and I was sent to the MLU (midwife led unit) to wait. I walked around and contractions started again. 
This is me between contractions as we waited.


Unfortunately as I had been examined the decision was made that I needed…